Another Artwork Executed

    It is done- my St. Therese painting that I have been so excited about. It was accomplished rather briskly for me, seeing as it is larger than 16 by 20 inches, and I hardly ever paint something even that sizable.

"No One Bothering to Catch It"

     I thought of this painting one night when I was rereading for at least the 15th time a section of The Story of a Soul. I was from chapter five, the chapter about the Christmas that changed everything:

I enjoyed painting this dress!

"As I closed my Missal after Mass one Sunday, a picture of the Crucifixion slipped out a little way, and I could just see one of the wounds in Our Lord's hands, with blood flowing from it. A strange new thrill passed over me. It pierced my heart with sorrow to see His Precious Blood falling, with not one bothering to catch it, and I made up my mind, there and then, to stay in spirit at the foot of the Cross, to gather up the dew of heavenly life and give it to others."
                         -St. Therese <3


It is also roughly based on the idea St. Therese would speak of, about letting fall a shower of roses from heaven. Thus the reason for the blood falling as roses (at least, that was what I was going for.)

Yes. These were a PAIN-lovely as roses are.

     This idea is also in this post from a few months ago, with the blood turning into roses. I almost said "transfigured" into roses, but I don't believe that would be accurate: some might think blood to roses is a change for the better, this is Christ's blood- it is far more beautiful than a garden of roses.
    That was one of those things you don't plan on posting, but just think of sporadically as you are writing. In fact, I hadn't thought of that before, not even when painting these two paintings. Interesting.
   I am going to share a St. Therese quote that I do NOT like. It is something that I find hard, and that I'd rather not be reminded of. I have to fight little, annoying, and slightly vicious thoughts when I read it or here it:

 "If I did not simply suffer from one moment to another, it would be impossible for me to be patient; but I look only at the present moment, forget the past, and I take good care not to forestall the future. When we yield to discouragement or despair it is usually because we give too much thought to the past and to the future. "-St. Therese of Lisieux

One Of Those Moments That Makes Everything Worth It

Last Weekend, a wonderful Priest, Fr. John Malloy of the Father's of Mercy, passed away. He was an Irish priest from Stanton Island, NY, who was always telling stories about his Irish New York City Cop of a dad who didn't tolerate no nonsense. He was a good man who never wanted to stop, and who wanted to "die with his boots on," and who blamed the poor nuns for keeping him from missionary work in the nursing home. Shortly after his 65th anniversary of being ordained to the priest hood, he passed away.
     Some time in the past few years, my Dad gave Fr. Malloy a print of one of my paintings from 2004. I remember thinking that I was glad he did it, but I wasn't sure how much good it did- Fr. Malloy's memory was deteriorating and I didn't know if he even remembered who I was, or if the painting would have any meaning to him at all. I think that the day we gave him the print was the last time I saw him alive.
      At the funeral, I had more than one person, including one of the nuns who took care of him, tell me that he actually was aware of the painting, that he was very proud of it, and that he had it with him within sight as he died. It was this painting that I did when I was about 15:

              It's funny. Things like this always happen when I am doubting whether I am called to study art at all. I have tried and tried and tried since I was about 6 (ok, 14) to get into art school, and it just refuses to work out- at least so far. In Austria (I studied abroad there for about 3 months with Franciscan University), this was a huge issue for me... There I was, on my last semester with Franciscan, about to graduate and leave my friends, go into the world, surrounded by AMAZING art in many forms, etc, and all I could think of was how I no longer felt called to study art, because 1), I had no way in sight to do it, and 2) because I felt I could never paint anything like the masters did- I could never paint anything that would make a difference or mean anything. But, during the weeks that were particularly hellish in this way (and that is hardly an exaggeration- art was my life), some little nun on campus in Austria would whisper in the chapel, "keep drawing," or, "can I see what you've drawn recently!?" (it's always nuns.... watch those nuns!)
      It's tough. You can't go to school to make yourself "useful," and you do blog posts of mice and spiders and dragons and Harry Potter. How on earth could God use that? And yet that's just it- I may be discouraged, but the fact is you just never know. The same day of the funeral, I read this in a little daily prayer book:
          
              "For those who love God, all things work together unto good." Rom 8:28


               Reflection: Those who love God are drawn nearer to the Father by every circumstance of daily life- joy brings them closer by ties of loving gratitude, and sorrow by the painful way of the Cross. 
               Those who do not love God become haughty and forget Him in the passing joys of this life and in sadness become bitter and desperate. 


               Prayer: "Lord, grant me Your true love. This is all I need."

This is why I LOVE BEING CATHOLIC SO MUCH! Jesus is good. As long as I strive to love and trust God more completely, to become a saint (A thought which nearly makes me laugh. Good thing God is ALL powerful.), everything is taken care of. I may have no idea what I am doing. I may not have known that a painting I did at 15 would mean so much to such a holy man during his last hours, but that didn't matter. I may never know of anything good I accomplish with my art ever again- but if I paint out of love, I can have complete confidence that it is doing something out there in time and eternity. St. Therese truly was such a gift. Her little way of trust in God's loving mercy applies to everything- so simple, yet all encompassing. I do not see how I could have made this far without her little way. If you have not read her Story of a Soul, fix that last year.
    
"Lord, grant me Your love. This is all I need."

May 14th, 2011: Yes I Have Been Busy! Ish.

   This painting is a commission I did for a friend, to be a graduation gift for another friend. So really, I was doing it for two friends- only, one got the painting, and the other did not. I will see what I can do for the paintingless friend in the future. ;)
   This painting is part of a style I seem to be developing: sketchy, impressionistic I suppose, and more contrasting. I like it. It's fun. I also actually really truly like this painting; which is odd, because I hardly ever like my work. It was rather painful to give up.

Hmm... how about another St. Therese quote I reread last night- I think it is rather perfect:

My joy I find in pain and loss,
I love the thorns that guard the rose;
With joy I kiss each heavy cross,
And smile with every tear that flows.
-St. Therese

April 19th, 2011: Passion Week

Well, this week is Passion Week... one of my favorite weeks of the year, if not my favorite of all. Out of all this week, I think that Thursday night and Good Friday are my favorite times. Side note: I was in Ireland last year during Holy Week. On Holy Thursday evening, I went for a walk by myself to an old broken down church and grave yard (it was the closest thing to going to church available... and besides, I was surrounded by celtic crosses <3 ), and for Good Friday we were in Killarney at the Franciscan Church... anyways, I love Holy Week and I love Ireland and the two remind me of each other, which is very bittersweet.

 So tonight I was wanting to get into the Holy Week spirit, and so I put in the Passion of the Christ soundtrack, and just drew in the time slot I had available. It's very rough- as usual. It reminds me of the Turin and Beleg picture I drew...  Anyways, I have a very special devotion to the Agony in the Garden, and I tend to want to sketch drawings like this a lot....

For some reason I am having the hardest time getting the scanner to come up with an accurate image. The face I drew looks so different in person... oh well. Oh computers... they will be the death of me. 

    I did a drawing of the Agony in the Garden last year when I was studying in Austria. I wanted to post that tonight, but I don't exactly know where it is at the moment... I will have to find it and post it later. 

    And once again, St. Therese has the quote of the day. I have been rereading Story of a Soul, as well as reading The Sadness of Christ by St. Thomas More for Lent. I will have to try to find some good quotes from the latter- it is an AMAZING book!

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"He wants me to love Him because He has forgiven me, not much, but everything. He did not wait for me to love Him with a great love... but made me see that He had loved me first, with an infinite providence, so that now I may love Him in return even unto folly" St. Therese

April 15th... No Drawing Yet, But A Funny Story (a.k.a an excuse)

So... I was going to go to the YMCA and Stations of the Cross, and then come home and spend a lovely evening drawing something (I want to do a drawing of a more happy persuasion...). But, yeah..... something happened: I had a headache before leaving, and so I went to the cabinet to take an advil, only, I took a sleeping pill by accident! So yeah... I BARELY jogged half a mile and had to sit the whole time during stations, and have been a zombie ever since.... Maybe I will draw SOMETHING later tonight, even if it's just a salt shaker. I will try, that is all I can promise.
      And for some reason the boys (I have two younger brothers) are walking around the kitchen communicating by saying only "coo coo".... when you're drunk on sleeping pills this does really strange things to your head.... just sayin.
     Oh! And I have been thinking that along with my own drawings, I may post artwork that I like by other artist, living and (mostly) dead. I just get so excited about stuff and want to share! I'm sure you won't mind. I hope.

An hour or two later:
Ok! I did a quick sketch! I remembered that I told a friend I would do a quick unicorn sketch for her, and so here it is. I have to confess I only spent like 10 minutes on it, but I intend to get her a more detailed drawing in the  future.

Ok... so there are flecks of some ferin' substance on this.... there must have been dust or something on my scanner.

     And here is my painting by someone else for the day. I have no idea who this is by; I found this in a magazine, but it didn't have a name or source, and I couldn't find it on google images... so I suppose we are out of luck this time. But I love it! It may be my current favorite of the Child Jesus so far. 

Absolutely lovely! I wish I knew who did it. If anyone knows, please tell me. 

     Since we are kind of on the theme of the Child Jesus, let's use a St. Therese quote for today:

"If I did not simply suffer from one moment to another, it would be impossible for me to be patient; but I look only at the present moment, forget the past, and I take good care not to forestall the future. When we yield to discouragement or despair it is usually because we give too much thought to the past and to the future. "-St. Therese of Lisieux

April 4th, 2011: Therese's Eye, Color Added, And A Bit of Emo Mixed With Horse

So it has been a while since I've posted. I did warn you that I would be gone about a week. But I can't deny that I was home allll this past weekend and did not post. I was busy mind you: I was adding color to my Passion painting below. Here is a bit of it:

This is the only section of it that I am happy with, and so it is the only part I will show you right now. Ugh. Why do these things never turn out as planned!?!? But anyway, the entire painting is colorized, but  most of it needs some major reworking before it is presentable. I worked on my anatomy DVDs this weekend as well:

Yes I know, I spelt "humerus" incorrectly (I like saying "spelt" better than "spelled" for some reason). I know right, SUCH an exciting sketch! But I chose this one because you can at least tell sorta that it is the humerus bone of the arm. The mess of lines on the top is the clavicle. Yes, I learned TWO words today: humerus, and clavicle.
     I also drew an emo girl (I was wanting to do a gothic-like victorian-ish drawing from either Jane Eyre or Phantom of the Opera, but my brain was so dead that I couldn't remember a scene, nor focus enough to read one). To the left of her is a quick crooked sketch based off St. Therese's eye, and to the right is a little horse. I wanted to draw a mouse, but some how a horse came out instead. Go figure.

While I am on St. Therese, I think I will put a quote by her yet again. Yes, I am rather fond of her.
      ...... Actually I changed my mind. Fulton Sheen has the quote of the day!

Broken things are precious. We eat broken bread because we share in the death of Our Lord and his broken life. Broken flowers give perfume. Broken inscence is used in adoration. A broken ship saved Paul and many other pssengers on their way to Rome. Sometimes the only way the good Lord can get into some hearts is to break them. - Fulton Sheen.

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March (I don't want to say it) 15th, 2011: Eustace is afraid!

Ok, so yes, I am a biit behind schedule.... I have excuses, but I am too tired and impatient to get this post done to mention them. So here is my sketch of the day! Again, I am working on princess Eustace for my friends story. I'm thinking there needs to be more people in it, more like a busy court. But here it is:

Trying to think of a quote or some nonsense to say... hmm..... Ah yes, some St. Therese. She's been reminding me of this a lot lately; which, I guess it is always a good thing to be reminded of:

"If I did not simply suffer from one moment to another, it would be impossible for me to be patient; but I look only at the present moment, forget the past, and I take good care not to forestall the future. When we yield to discouragement or despair it is usually because we give too much thought to the past and to the future. "-St. Therese of Lisieux